Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
