Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
