Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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