I don't think brook has ever known best
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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