Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
