if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
