That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I have fence marks all over my body
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
