We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
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Do I have a choice?
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Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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