Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
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