Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
