Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
