I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
