the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
