Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Is Oprah even human
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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