hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
