Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
