It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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