you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
