Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Randomize
