I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize