Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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