Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Randomize
