i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
