somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
