so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
