You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
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