forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Randomize
