If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
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