It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
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