I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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