Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
