He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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