After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
