He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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