Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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