Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
This baby is an asshole
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
