Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
