Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
