You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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