Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
