No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Randomize
