Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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