we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
