yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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