don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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