Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
return my video game
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
