I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
