Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
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