Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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