i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
