dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize
