is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
